Adulthood

This entry was originally posted on 15 March 2004 at 2:11 p.m.

When i was a kid i used to think that there was some quasi-magical point in a person's life when they become an adult--and once they'd reached that point, they'd be confident, secure, and knowledgeable about the world. Over and above that, they'd know their place in life, what they were meant to do, who they were meant to be. If they knew an answer to a question, they knew it and if they didn't, it was no big deal; presumably, they knew everything they were supposed to know to do their job, deal with insurance companies, own a house, buy a car, balance a checkbook, and so on.

What an incredibly naive outlook on life! Not that it's embarrassing; at that age, simplicity and completeness are the only things that make sense. In reality, if there is any embarrassment, it lies with the "adult" for not ever really reaching that state. I think of all the supposed adults i've known in my life, and i have yet to meet one who doesn't doubt some facet of his or her being, who doesn't have regrets, who isn't confused about some major life issue. And suddenly, the older i get, the less confident, less secure, and less knowledgeable about the world adults seem to be.

And you know what? Somehow, i find some comfort in this.